You feel me?

Feelings. We hear so much about them and most people show that they have them. All we want is someone to understand what we are feeling.

I am reading a book by Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott called Trading Places. The Parrotts are psychologists who deal with marriage and other relationships. Oh yeah, they are husband and wife. The main theme of this book is empathy. They say the best way to have a good relationship with a spouse is through putting yourself in the partner's view. This leads to true understanding.

It is important to get to the underlying issue. People will not be upfront with you. I know I am not. I will bury the issue that is bothering me and focus on something else. It takes head and heart action to take the time to fully understand someone's feelings. Then the real concern can be handled.

The Parrotts say that most couples feel they do not understand what the other is thinking. It can be difficult. The good news is they say it is not as difficult as it sounds, if you work at it.

If you think like your spouse or the special person, then you can truly understand. It can be a scary thing, but not as scary a misunderstanding between a couple.