Apology accepted

Hello to all who were wrong and now right

I just read the book The 4th Secret of the One Minute Manager by Ken Blanchard and Margaret McBride. It was all about the use of apology in business and in life. Apparently these authors are speakers on manager techniques. The other three one minutes proposals are: one minute goals, one minute praises, and one minute reprimands.

This book was able the cost of mistakes. It is written in narrative form about an assistant whose boss makes a mistake which could bring down the company. The board is very upset and the boss is arrogant. The story was hokey and cliche in some parts. The assistant just happened to have a friend/mentor who was a career coach and invite him to a family gathering during the July 4th weekend. However, the truths of the book are good. In the end everyone has an epiphany and everything works out.

The premise of the book is that when a person makes a mistake, he should immediately offer an apology. That is the only way to restore the relationship. It is not good enough just to say "I'm sorry," but the person must offer true feelings. There must be a change of behavior. Actions must carry the words.

A person who has been wronged can ask for an apology. This seems weird to me, but makes sense. What has the person to lose? If the offender did not know and apologizes the relationship is restored. If the offender does not apologize then the person asking forgiveness did not lose anything. It all depends on how important the relationship is. The more important the relationship the more work will have to be put into it. If you do not care about the person, then you do not care what he does.

The first part about restoring a mistake is being honest. A person must be honest with himself in recognizing a mistake is made. It could have been an action taken or even not acting in a situation. If a person is not honest about himself, he will not see the need to change. A person must be honest about the situation. Recognition comes before responsibility and then restoration.

Integrity is the next component. Once a person is honest, he will know whether he wants that to be his behavior. If it is not the behavior desired, then change it. Then the person is free to make amends. This seems hard because integrity is the part that everyone sees. You can hide honesty because it starts with thought, but you cannot hide your actions long. Many people consider integrity important, but few people live it. The book shows that we can live with integrity because we have the love we need already. Many people try to achieve love by gain and not by gifts. Granted there are some people who do not share their love unless conditions are met. You can either work with them or leave them. It can be a hard decision.

One interesting story in the book was told by a minister. He closed his sermon with a story about playing Monopoly with his grandmother. His grandmother always beat him until one game. Then the grandmother teaches the boy a life lesson. "It always goes back in the box." This means no matter how much you accumulate in life in the end you are only left with your self worth. People may remember what you had, but they will remember more how you were.

Something to think about and I am sorry about rambling...